So I actually wrote this pregnant, I have chosen to keep it in the past tense though because I think pregnant ladies will hopefully be able to relate to how I felt ❤️
Pregnancy in an pandemic is certainly something I never expected I would be writing or experiencing. It’s certainly made the end of my pregnancy journey a very different experience to my last. The excitement of appointments is no longer there, it’s now a ball of anxiety, of possibly catching something. The desperation of my baby coming before her due date is majorly down to wanting her here before the situation in hospitals gets worse, not the excitement of being excited to what she looks like. All crazy emotions I never expected to feel.
Isolation and staying at home is the last thing I wanted to be doing in my pregnancy, but I’m left with no choice. The Monday Boris Johnson announced that pregnant women may be at risk I was called by my work, who have been nothing but amazing, and was told to stay at home until future notice for my safety. I took this as taking precautions and still at this point I didn’t quite realise the seriousness of the situation. My midwife was touching upon the subject but didn’t seem worried.
It wasn’t until Lock Down was announced that I realised how the last month of my pregnancy was going to be worrying and uncertain. Appointments rearranged, my husband no longer allowed to see his baby at our growth scans, staff wearing masks (completely understandable but never the less unsettling when already feeling anxious).
It’s been a strange one to say the least.
Not leaving home with the exception of the 1 hour a day exercise allowance has been difficult. Not only because I want to stay fit and healthy in pregnancy but because along with this I have a 3 year old to entertain. My little boy I planned to have the best adventures with in our last two weeks together before his little sister arrived, I had so many plans for us. Though these have all been cancelled we have made the best of a bad situation and created lovely memories at home.
There is a little taster for you of pregnancy in a pandemic. As for birth, well I sit and think about that daily with apprehension and worry. Finns birth did not go to plan and became very scary. It’s not nice to know that my next experience won’t be any nicer due to the epidemic. Guidelines change each day, but at the moment, I am to labour on my own at hospital until I am in established labour. Then my husband will be called to come in as long as he has no symptoms.
Pain relief I had planned on having an epidural but have been advised to look into other pain coping strategies as anaesthetists are in higher demand in Covid 19 areas now. I can completely understand this, but again is unsettling when you have had a birth plan in mind for a while.
You are allowed one birthing partner as appose to the usual two, this doesn’t effect me as the plan was just my husband. When I have had my baby he can stay for a couple of hours then must leave, I won’t see him again, and he won’t see his wife or his baby girl again until we are released. Which it’s sad but manageable if it’s not a long hospital stay, so I pray for a straightforward birth.
It’s difficult not to think about what could go wrong, what the rules may be when I eventually give birth. But I will torture myself if I don’t try and think positive about the unknown experience that awaits me.
It’s a difficult time for everyone, and a scary time to be pregnant but I just telling myself ‘it is what it is’, I’m not the only women in this situation. We’ll come out at the other side, and when my baby girl is in my arms all the anxiety of what’s is happening around me with just stop for them perfect few seconds.
Love Emily X